Craig Bellamy has revealed that he felt "angry" with Gary Speed when he discovered that the former Wales manager had committed suicide.
Speed, who played alongside Bellamy at Newcastle United and coached him during his stint at Wales, was found hanged at his home in Cheshire in November 2011.
Writing in his autobiography GoodFella, Bellamy said: "I couldn't comprehend it. Speedo was my idol in football. He was everything I tried to become. I spoke to him pretty much once a week for the last 10 years.
"Then the tears started to fall. I knew it was real then. I just broke down. I didn't sleep that night. I was thinking about his kids. He adored his kids. I couldn't believe he had left them. And you know what, I felt angry with him, too.
"I adored him and looked up to him and had the highest respect for him. And now he was dead and I felt angry with him. I felt angry with him for leaving. I felt angry with him for leaving like this."
Bellamy, who now plays for Cardiff City, was a Liverpool player at the time of Speed's death.